There is a young woman who runs our office library...keep exchanging the occasional hello with her. Since I had been instrumental in getting the library set-up I guess she ends up talking more to me than others in office...

I was at the library today to exchange a book...in a hurry as usual...irritated that I hadn't yet had time to grab lunch, counting off a never-ending job list in my head, thinking about my laundry list of personal problems...basically immersed in my world like everyone else around me...

The girl gives me my book and out of the blue says "I've been crying a lot today". My reaction...well...was kind of a non-reaction for a while. One part of me, the part that was openly taken aback was like 'Whaaa...where did that come from"...the other part of me was like "Oh noooo...I don't have the time to play agony aunt. Not when I have so many problems of my own!"...

But since I'm not such a bitch as my initial reaction made me out to be...at least I like to think so...and since something must have been very wrong for her to say something like that to a virtual stranger...I figured this deserved some time and attention...

And the very brief confidence really left me speechless...she is 34, with a 14 year old daughter...her husband passed away 12 years back. That's all she would say. Nothing more about why she was sad. But it was enough to make me feel like a super selfish brat!

Here I was fighting with my husband over how he "didn't listen". And here she was with absolutely no one to talk to (something she mentioned). Here I was not willing to go back home too early coz I found it too full of people (whereas I prefer solitude). And when I told her to take the rest of the day off and go home she said she didn't want to...coz there was no one there at home and it was too lonely.

I was bugged with office for not giving me a better appraisal. And she was stuck in a dead end job that she hated but couldn't dream of leaving, unless she found better prospects - being a single mom and so on.

Today was something of a reality check. I'm not saying that our individual problems are not important. There will always be issues bigger than what troubles you at any point of time and I don't believe that in any way makes our troubles less painful to us. But what I did feel after that conversation was that sometimes, paying attention to others kind of helps you gain a perspective on your life. On your problems. It might not lighten your burden. But it sure as hell gives you fresh courage to tackle them. Coz you know, that like this girl, you may have had to deal with much worse.

So you can't let the smaller stuff get you down. It's just not an option. At least not to me.