What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger they say.
I beg to differ.
When, over time, you come out of a fucked-up situation, are you really stronger? Or is it just a euphemism for saying you're now even more of a cynical, hardened bitch than before?
After all, it's not like you come out unscathed. What about the burn marks - which then harden into unseen scabs? What about those occasional jabs of pain? Is that a tougher, more resilient you? Or someone with a more tightly walled-up heart?
Do you really learn your lessons? Or do you then make a slightly different mistake at another time, another place.
They say don't wallow in self-pity. But no-one tells you anything about self-doubt. They say no one can disrespect you if you don't give them the opportunity. They never warn you that trusting someone is opportunity enough.
They tell you that time heals all wounds...they never tell you that the ripple effect of that one memory in time has the power to shape so many of your moments to come.
You come out of a fucked-up situation thinking you're wiser and smarter. You can be that...if you agree to be infinitely more foolish...time and again...
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