We're Just Friends

This website caught my eye...and my fancy... - http://dailydishonesty.com/

The most honest portrayal of dishonesty I've seen in a while. Almost makes our little white lies seem like something fun.

Here's my list:

Nothing's wrong/I'm fine
Sorry I just saw your message
I'm going on a diet from tomorrow
I've cut down on drinking
It doesn't matter to me
I'm not scared of being alone
You look great
I'll clean my cupboard this weekend
I want to go bungee jumping
I have no regrets
I love you

Source: http://calvy.wordpress.com/2012/09/28/pause-and-ponder/

Now Hiring

Job title: Alcohol-Induced-Stupidity-Controller

Qualifications: At least 25 years spent as a teetotaller, or at the very least someone who can control his drink. Failing all of this has superhuman self-control which he/she can then use to bodily carry me away from potential disaster.

Responsibilities:

1. Don't let me drink
2. If you let me drink, don't leave me alone with people
3. If you leave me alone, drug me first so that I don't remain conscious long enough to TALK

 Compensation: My undying gratitude?

It takes two to tango

I'd like to dance to this someday

A dark stage - a single spotlight

Maybe a mixture of jazz, modern ballet and the tango

And someone who can keep up to my pace.